The words “I believe in you” are a joy to hear.
It gives us a boost.
However, this is only temporary.
If others have faith in us, it gives us a false sense of esteem.
It can also bring pressure. Pressure to prove worthy of the faith with which we have been entrusted.
How often have you looked outside of yourself for affirmation and validation? To be accepted?
I know I have been a repeat offender of this. I gave too much power to people and things outside of myself.
I gave away my power completely.
And giving away power means you can be broken so easily.
In the past, I turned to substances and behaviours to make myself more “acceptable”.
I drank initially to relax and fit in. I didn’t feel so awkward.
I starved myself to be skinny, which in my mind equated to beauty.
I looked to men to affirm my worth, which ultimately diminished it even more, along with my self-respect.
The fact is, I didn’t love myself. Heck, I didn’t even like myself. I wasn’t comfortable in my skin and I desperately wanted that to be fixed by someone or something outside of me.
My endless pursuit of affirmation and validation from external sources led me to hospitals, clinics and a place of hopelessness and despair.
One of the most valuable lessons I have learnt in a very painful decade is that belief and self-esteem has to come from within.
We cannot get lasting affirmation from anything or anyone other than ourselves.
As someone very wise says to me, “It’s an inside job.”
The only person who can change things is you.
I didn’t believe in myself, and I still have times when I have doubts.
Sometimes silencing the negative voice is hard, almost impossible.
So, what do I do?
I prove with my ACTIONS that I believe in myself.
I treat myself well.
I treat other people well.
I do things to be helpful to others.
I respect my body, mind and spirit,
I invest in my business and self-development.
As they say: Actions speak louder than words.
What can you do today to grow your self-belief, self esteem and prove to yourself that you are worth pursuing your dreams?